About Mystreious Thorns of The World, and a few other things

Partial view of progress window painting

"I can add thorns as much as I like to this ordinally otherworldly world."

I told to myself in my mind when I was painting this painting a few nights ago.

I meant about the progress window painting when I told it to myself in my art studio.
Thinking back, I feel it can be applied to the world itself too. We all can by the way we behave.

But originally what I meant (behind or beneath, if the progress painting was the surface) with that was that when we are on quarantine and we are not allowed to maintain our everyday lives, it if difficult to feel normal. But to me, the time I am painting, or time I am in studio helps me feel normal when I am there.

I think quarantine itself does not have negative meaning, lonely though, but the enforcement does have negative face. Forced quarantine is not fun even for the quarantine practiced artists. The feeling of that it is mandatory order that is right outside of our doors.

Such feeling I cannot control something is awfully scary to me, especially when it is about the whole everyday life itself that we are living and we must live, and that continuous days form who we are.

We must not relay on the things we can control on to much to find ourselves in them though. It is dangerous, but things we have controls on are what allow us to exist meaningfully in the society and give us some responsibility.

Because when we have power over something to decide something..., we can ruin it if we didn’t listen to signs and hints from the subject, to sense and to find the perfect balance are the secrets to maintaning such power, and thus power of such kind simply cannot exist solitary.

I learn this from my paintings, where I have much control on, and not just that, I see the results and affects on the canvas immediately.

This is a shared natural law for our relationships to outside world, between people, between objects, between nations.

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Progress image of Cat in A Dream Painting

Opening my eyes, and I am still in New York City, a bizarre city as quarantine continues.

I should have been in Tokyo now if the pandemic did not happen.

Back in March, I was still planning and wishing to go back to Japan, at least until middle of last month, until my flights were canceled by a flight company.

The world has changed since then quickly and dramatically, it is not only in NYC it is changing in Japan as well and all over the world. Now, according to what my roomate told me (because I did not want to search and confirm by myself, I am assuming it is a correct information), there is only one flight per week to Japan from NYC.

I should have been at my home, and I should have been telling my parents face to face, thank you for giving me a birth, and celebrating my birthday as they wished.  That was what I really wanted to do for my birthday, as a daughter who is selfish in a way I am away from them for years and seeing them once a year at the most if my work condition allows.

Now that is a dream which must be postponed, we must all stay inside and keep ourselves healthy.

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One thing that has changed very quickly and dramatically (that could directly affect my art) by this pandemic is that "Window" has became a very popular subject in art. I have seen some known artists started to work with Window as a subject this past two years, but this quarantine has made it to be spread like the latest fashion trend.

The window is my ongoing series work I started in around early 2012(maybe late 2011), which I intensively started to work in 2017, the theme window got a blight spotlight and suddenly it has became of everyone’s interests because of this covid-19 pandemic and quarantine.

For while it made me anxious and nervous, and little uncomfortable that this pandemic will take my life long unique subject away from me, not only my day work. With this quarantine panic, it increased window themed art (looking inside) which was almost none before, but now on almost all major art magazines and art newsletters along with other pandemic and quarantine themed art. But now I don't feel so negative because I realized it won't take my subject that I can reflect my life long interest away from me.

What we are painting in windows are fundamentally different, I can paint window that looks like quarantined it cannot be just about quarantine because it it not, it is more complex. But I would say that our experience of this global pandemic that we are going thorugh together now will give a whole new meaning and dimension and new depth to my work, to people who will look at them in the future.

When the pandemic is gone and when quarantine is over, the window hype will also disappear naturally.
Yet, still it wouldn't change that I want to make a good new window painting, one after another.

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The quarantine won't make us do things we aways wanted to do, but it will gives us more time.

I believe that things we really really wanted to do from bottom of our heart, we have been doing it by now. We will find any time and excuse to do it, we will allow any necessary reasons to give it perfect justice to do it anyway. As my latest favorite book author says "Human life exists only right now at this present moment, and only by living it fully."(this is  my rough translation of a line from JPN to ENG from one of the four books.) I agree. I am not an idealist in the way same as the author, I am a quite strict realist in that sense. (and I wish if I could be an idealist when I see a spontaneous idealist.)

What we are doing now, whether it is, habit or routine or obligation or work or anything else, it is at one point, for the most of time, what we want to do consciously or not, deep in our mind, or in our simple structure as an animal. This is more true, when we live in advanced society.

So, the time we have from the panemic (unwanted quarantine) is not the time to do what we have been wanting to do, but to do what we want to do right now.

Anyhow, I have been in the bathtub for quite long time for this past month as well... becaue my reading time is also my bath time. I have been there as long as making me finish reading four nice books I have been in hot water.

Since I feel I want to share with you my personal life little more than usual, here is the four books I read this month in a chronological order, and are all great book (4 books in the image above):


・富原眞弓　ムーミン谷のひみつ
・ヤンソン　ムーミン谷の彗星
・Bashar (3) Channel: Darryl Ankaワクワクするとき、ひとはもっとも多く学ぶ。
・坂口安吾　堕落論

They are all great book, surprisingly way beyond what I expected, I recommend to do so if you have chance to read.

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I do not want it to sound immoral because it has been affecting my life dramatically in not quite positive ways too, but on the most bright side I can possibly look at, this quarantine might be, for personal scale, the best gift from the world to my creation. Ever since I decided to live as a professional artist, everything happening around me from awful things to great things in the beginning, was in the end the best for my art as if my art was supported by something that is not me.


A day before my birthday, I brought myself to my favorite place in New York City.
I like New York City because it is such a luxurious place to live, endless powerful energy from the people and the nature, if we look around and listen to our surroundings.

Thorns of the World,
we don't know how they look like.
It is something what we might be making, we might be growing.
Do we need them? I am still looking for the answer.

"The water is fine."

As someone said, I say it back to the world from time to time.

Can you guess where I first heard(read) this phrase?

Happy Spring Everyone!